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Author Topic:   I am finally on the right path. . .
666
Member
posted September 25, 2004 09:36 AM            
Yes, finally I am off the destructive path of violence and on steadfast the path of sorrow. Rarely am I on this path, but I need it now.

Why? Because I have been violent to the ones I love.

As my son slept last night, I quietly sobbed holding is hand asking for forgiveness for harming him yesterday. I hardly ever hit my kids, and here I hit one of them twice in a day. Why? What am I doing?

Only this morning sobbing quietly in bed next to Susan do I realize that I was angry with what is going on online and in the forums.

How could my friend pull a Guido and cause people to leave an online game?

How could my friend post hurt in the forums I read?

I am sobbing while I write this and have to pause ÖI am so sad what is going on.

How could a friend of mine take apart the game we both love?

I did a mistake; I solved a problem without asking. I have done this several time to Susan, and to my get surprise I have cause her sorrow.

For now, I only ask you to stop. I ask nothing more. You have done enough and I am too sad to want to play the game other then events that I should attend.

Maybe one day we will talk, but for now, please stop.

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 25, 2004 11:28 AM            
Grow up Dave.... its a game, period. But if ur hitting ur kids, thsts none of my concern.

[This message has been edited by =DNX= Matrix (edited September 25, 2004).]

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coaxs
Member
posted September 25, 2004 07:02 PM            
I think the job in itself is draining, why don't you take some time off and let thetaxi deal with us for awhile.

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Tread Marks Ladders

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Teulk
Member
posted September 25, 2004 07:24 PM            
I have to agree with coaxs---time for a break---definitely.
When something you are doing is causing you that much grief, it is time for a major break--Highly recommended--no questions asked..
R&R- for a while--you deserve a break today--and for a while--enjoy RL for a bit..

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pablito
Member
posted September 25, 2004 08:50 PM            
Dave, tenderness it's a symbol of kindness, there's nothing wrong with that! But sometimes you need punishment, especially for the people you love.
Don't feel bad, we like this game whether a punk decides to bring drama...
I was upset because I'm custom to come to TM and have a blast... if one wants to change that, then we'll just have to wait until "it" goes away.
(remark at request)
OM, how easy you can bring the evil out of you....
ANYWAYS... just another chapter in this great game. You also kinda need the black sheep to recognize how valuable everyone else is

[This message has been edited by pablito (edited September 28, 2004).]

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Irascible
Member
posted September 25, 2004 10:13 PM            
This sort of effeminate mea culpa does not belong here 666. But since you insist on this public display, you invite public commentary. Oddly enough, my comment mirrors that of the grumpy Brit: Grow up Dave.

You mention Guido. I will gladly state again that I was one of the first to take his sorry arse on in a serious way and call for his dismissal from the forum. That's how a man takes care of business. He's sees a problem and addresses it. If you have a problem with Matrix, as is everyone's duty on the forum at one time or another, you solve it or you tell him to go to hell. But you don't kick the proverbial dog, cry in bed and do the Oprah about it online. It seems you've induced sympathy amongst some. But what you need is a smack upside the head for this display of neutered manhood.

What's more, you need a smack upside the head for your utter refusal to see the truth. Matrix is a known quantity. Whether you think him good or bad, there is NOTHING new here. How many times has he blasted the entire friggin community for not attending his events in sufficient quantity? How many times has he lamented the lack of response to his mods and explained it by indirectly insulting those not responding? Over and over you saw it and you ignored it. He was your good bud. Never mind that he routinely and most often unjustly criticized the community and individuals. He wasn't doing it to you so it was OK.

This brazen and undiplomatic utterance of truth will no doubt bring out the girl scouts who will blast me for my lack of compassion. Knock yourselves out ladies. Though do try to make at least a little sense when you do. What Iíve stated IS the truth of the matter. When a snake bites others time and time again and you ignore it, rationalize it and even visit its den then you deserve what you get when it finally bites you. Crying about it is worthless. The proper response it is to stop playing with the damn thing and chop its head off. Thatís a metaphor. Matrix is no snake. But whatever he is, and for that matter whatever I am, is old news to everyone but those with rose colored glasses. Take the friggin glasses off so that you might see.

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coaxs
Member
posted September 25, 2004 10:26 PM            
Any leadership position held in the community suffers from constant attack by others. One needs to be somewhat apathetic to handle the position. One also needs to take breaks and sometimes very long breaks to get their energy and enthusiasm back. I know you like to have several events in a week but perhaps this is just too draining to go through so often for over a year now. You need to pass the torch on for a while and take a very well deserved break from TM. Paranor passed the torch on permanently because he got tired of people and having to set up the servers for every event. I've been known to take a break for several months, Super is still on break.

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Tread Marks Ladders

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 25, 2004 11:58 PM            
Oh contrare' my dear friend, Super is BACK and fighting in tonights DDM You can be SuperCoaxs again ..... Bam is also fighting as is Ni and GMan..... thats 5

The time guys has come to put up or shut up, im even considering paying LDA to install logscan, quietly .. to log everytime one of you primeordial spazholes (meaning certain indeviduals here not the community at large) spawnfrags or reloads.

TIP : Matrix handbook 101, dont throw stones in glass houses.

My learnered friend Ras as several good point's ... first, I AM GRUMPY .... see illustration to my immediate right -- > ( ).... second, i AM a known quantity in that i do off the rails and lose the plot in a completly indescriminate way when upset... the 1 thing id like to state though is that there are 2 things going on here... the first im over, thats dave and the case of the wierd flags. It would have been nice to have been informed and have some input if ones work is to be improved and redistributed, thats plain old common sense, consideration and all round good karma.... its a minor nothing.

The second is aimed spoecificly at cats whom true to their nature spit and scratch me every chance they get (or seem to).

Tired am I of sitting and taking it .... so like the teacher with a class of mixed players, everybody stays back for detention because of the few. Yeah i know this is a childish attitude, but they do say youre as young as you feel... i maybe 33, but i feel a good sight younger The net result from all of this is choice..... freedom and rights - THE AMERICAN WAY BABY !! If i respect a player, i will make the choice to back off, the players i know WILL back off as opposed to the ones i feel will fire as they have before n stabbed me in the back for my goodness....., ill drill their faces off at the drop of a hat - sadly this now the case for all cats since ever1 of em has had a dig; one even said they would hunt me down on every map i played - bad move sukka... its like a film really in a way, when the bad guy tells the good guy what his plans are b4 they kill him, and then it all turns up good and the plans get reversed. Welcome to your online fun for the next few matches pal.. Wrong time wrong place fells, cos when i rampage, you better step aside. Im sure ill cool off at some point... but till that occurs, watch your back (btw, ill still shoot the **** out of you if ur on my team, that does not stop fragging)... nothing worse than an itch you cant scratch.

I hope thats explained a couple of items in greater detail... beyond that i have no reason or inclination to explain myself further in forums or IM, i am how i am and i play as i feel ... and some days ..... I FEEL BAD - deal with it.

Have a nice day. lol

[This message has been edited by =DNX= Matrix (edited September 26, 2004).]

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pablito
Member
posted September 26, 2004 12:17 AM            
Cats don't scratch unless they feel threaten, as for me I don't even like to scratch... people that knows me know that I rather frag and shut up. My own advise to all in our clan. You have been mocking people in the servers, that's why they tell you stuff, I wish they would listen to me and let you be....but you seem to prioritize your actions while playing and disrespect everyone. Don't blame it on us for defending ourselves from your comments, it's human nature, and I would be worry if they'll try to keep quiet as I do.
I don't need to say what you have done or said because everyone seems to know.
I don't see potential harm coming from you, therefore don't need to watch my back. Other players in your clan and other clans are the ones I'm really interested about.
Too bad you changed, as far as I remember, we started in a good note. Notice you are the one instigating. You can't provoke and don't accept the consequences. But as I say, each time I see anyone, I give the benefit of the doubt. You can always "try" to play and have fun, and maybe we all do. I would personally talk to someone that disrespect you or provoke you for no reason.

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Sailor
Administrator
posted September 26, 2004 01:10 AM            
Pooh - isn't humanity funny!!!!!

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May you always have a following Sea a cool breeze at your back and the comfort of those you hold nearest to your heart.
Sailor's Home Port


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Teulk
Member
posted September 26, 2004 01:47 AM            
Ras--as much as the truth may hurt---and only God knows that I know the truth as well as you seem to know it---do you really think that being such a cold hearted pric$ about the whole thing is absolutlely necessary?? Does humanity ever shine behind those dead sharks eyes?? Just once--a positive humane remark--is that at all possible from the recesses of that ego-maniacal mind??

Matrix---maybe it's time that you backed off a bit?? The whole vendetta macho thing is really getting a bit tiresome...inasmuch as it may seem the thing to do, just DO it--and stop dallying about it for petes sake..

Pablito---maybe you could just let it go for a while...if character assassination was a sport, you MIGHT get a bronze---yes--unfortunately, there are others here well up the rank on THAT particular ladder

coaxs--thanks for that rather neutral response..best display of common sense I've seen here in weeks...

[This message has been edited by Teulk (edited September 26, 2004).]

[This message has been edited by Teulk (edited September 26, 2004).]

[This message has been edited by Teulk (edited September 26, 2004).]

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GoldAnt_Number1
Member
posted September 26, 2004 01:47 AM            
you said "pooh" silly human! oh the insanity of us all lol =)

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 26, 2004 02:43 AM            
"pooh" was enough lol .... almost as insane as "fiddlesticks" - oh the pure intensity of it all, utter unadulterated verbal brutality lol....

Teulk, you may be right man, maybe its time i did back off a bit... message delivered and hopefully lessons have been learned... only time will tell

As i consistently tell others, my methoids maybe extreme - but they do work

quote:
my methoids maybe extreme - but they do work

- METHOIDS !!! WTF IS A METHOID LMAO !! maybe its a modding of method rather than a modding method. Who knows, if you have time free, you work it out lol ....

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Irascible
Member
posted September 26, 2004 03:03 AM            
Yes T. Being a cold hearted prick IS absolutely necessary - at least as you define it. In reality, it is no such thing. Facing a problem head on is a lot more compassionate than sugar coating and avoiding it. In this case the real cause of 666's kvetching isn't Matrix. Matrix's character has been on display for all to see, just like the rest of us. The problem is that 666 ignored it until it finally affected him personally.

The irony is rich. I and others have been on the receiving end of Matrix's fury before. What was 666's response? To equivocate, find equal blame in all involved, and beg that we all just... sniff... get along. I suppose if instead of engaging Matrix in flames I had just kicked my cat and cried on the forum about it, I too would be deserving of sympathy. Well, the coin has turned. It's 666's turn to deal him. Normally I'd be all over Matrix like stink on a skunk. He's certainly deserving. But 666's response is absurd. His complete unwillingness to face conflict led to his current problem. Only the willingness to face some conflict will solve it.

Stick around long enough and it WILL happen again. Leopards and spots, or some such thing. Tired of it? Ignore it and tell all involved to go to hell. Want an end to it? Expel those who perpetrate the acts. Want more of it and be oh so personally injured by it? Sugar coat it, ignore it and ask that we all get along.

As far as your assessment of my world view and/or character goes - I will take my own advice and tell you to go to hell. Well... figuratively speaking anyway. I'd much rather you knew Christ and spent eternity in heaven. The weather is much better there.

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 26, 2004 03:08 AM            
U have no idea how much i agree with that ras. I despise conformaty... ever see the film "Pleasantville" ? or "Ferris Beullers Day Off" - theres lessons to be learned there for sure.

Leopard and spots - yup - its true, ill turn like an alsatian on anyone who comes at me, friend or foe... to take away ones right to defend themselves is most definately NOT the american way The instability makes me unstable, spontanious, unpredicatable... sometimes i quite like that quality; and in all fairness dave did contact me, he just has a very subtle, gentle way of handling things...

But one thing is certain... the coward, the man that backs down or remains silent, is no man at all... stand upto ppl... listen to the person within yourself, be true, to yourself - dont conform to what others expect, just be ... be yourself, its upto others to accept you, not for you to change to their ideals.

Serman over, you may go home now - dont forget to leave a fiver in the box on the way out I need a new car .... lol

[This message has been edited by =DNX= Matrix (edited September 26, 2004).]

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Irascible
Member
posted September 26, 2004 03:20 AM            
This is too funny. You do realize Matrix that if I were to distill some of what I said above down, it would be: Matrix is often a horse's rear and only now you're figuring that out 666? Furthermore, I implied that if it's really that bad then they should kick you out. Otherwise they need to deal with it without all the hurt feelings. And you appear to be agreeing with that!

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 26, 2004 03:51 AM            
If ive been an ass, i deserve to be kicked out no question about that, id do it in a second on my board without a 2nd thought; but there, its my decision, here, its upto LDA and the admins... if they think i deserve it, they should do it - id even support it, on one occasion ive even asked for it.

Some ppl realise that theres more to my rants than meets the eye though, look deeper m8, look deeper

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-DNX-Ni
Member
posted September 26, 2004 05:50 AM            
I feel I should add my 2 cents, but all that can be said on the matter has been said! Roll on tonight in FUN but serious clan war. The irony is it seems to have already started and I'm sure people will feel better by shooting off more than steam!

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 26, 2004 08:37 AM            
** dirty mags at the ready Ni ** lol

..by, which, i mean, computer mags, err, dropped in a puddle , err, with mud in it, yeah, thats what i mean, yeah

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KONG
Member
posted September 26, 2004 11:56 AM            

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 26, 2004 02:36 PM            
Another FORBIDDEN image...

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Paranor
Member
posted September 26, 2004 09:25 PM            
All of the images are coming in fine for me. Can't wait to see the movie either. SPLASHES! SPLASHES! SPLASHES! SPLASHES!

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666
Member
posted September 26, 2004 11:38 PM            
Man ... I was a basket case on Saturday...yes an emotional wreak. Though I did mean everything that I posted, it is what I felt at the time. Sometimes I wish someone would take the keyboard away from me when I am like this.

I have been sick for the last 2 days not able to eat or drink anything, not even water. Being sick did not help my emotional state, though I lost 10 pounds.

I would say that I need to cry to flush it all out, what was going on in TM just sparked the flood.

Thank for the words of comfort Coax, Pablito and Teulk.

Thanks for the humor GA, Sailor, and Kong.

Thank you Ras and Matrix...er...for being yourselves.

If anything has come of this...Ras and Matrix have agreed on something.

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Irascible
Member
posted September 26, 2004 11:52 PM            
Yeah. We both agreed that he's a jerk! LOL!

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=DNX= Matrix
Member
posted September 27, 2004 12:16 AM            
hehehe comes with the job description

[This message has been edited by =DNX= Matrix (edited September 27, 2004).]

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